Two weeks ago, I held a baby. I went to a lash tech in New Haven and she had her 3 month old there.

I don’t remember the last time — actually I do! I think the last time I was around a baby was 2023, my cousin’s baby. But I never held him.

Anywho, lash tech let me hold her newborn while she was doing my lashes.

There I was, laying down, eyes closed, holding this infant, propping her up in a seated position on my stomach.

It was silly and weird and nice.

We talked about families, people moving, cheating, childbirth, breastfeeding and motherhood.

I was so interested in the conversation that I forgot to mention that I don’t want kids.

I don’t really like how my lashes turned out but I still tipped her.

I saw Mona on my way to the appointment.

Everytime I see her I get worried that she’s doing worse. I also sigh with relief that she’s still here.

Sometimes I think to check the New Haven obituaries.

But who knows if Mona is even her real name.

I like her. She always asks for 10s and 20s and she rarely says thank you.

I don’t think she needs to thank me at all.

Is it not our duty to keep each other alive?

What good do verbal expressions of gratitude do?

She thanks me by staying alive and I thank her by giving her money.

I think I’m resembling my father more every day, but maybe he was right.